When you’re struggling with mental illness or you’re quite simply exhausted with life and feeling a little grumpy, there’s always one thing that people will say to you and almost every time it will fall on deaf ears and almost make you feel angry and patronised: just think positive.
I’ve been there when the world feels like it’s crashing down around you and this one line of advice seems to be the quick-fix we are constantly given. At the time, we can feel angry and deem this advice useless and unhelpful but deep down, there is some true value here.
Wait, don’t click off this blog just yet! I’m not here to tell everyone to be positive and happy when your mind is against you because I know just how unhelpful that can feel for an overwhelmed mind, I’m just here to give a little insight into my mindset that has helped me along the way. Something I always remind myself, which immediately lifts my spirits and adjusts everything back into perspective. I’ll try and keep this short and sweet, so here it is…
Picture this. Our lives are not as straight-forward as one might think, it is not born-live-die. In fact, it is born-live-live-live-live-die. By this, I mean that within one life there is a million different lives. I view each period of time within my life as a separate life. This makes it a little easier when waiting for storms to pass as I can just tell myself that this life is temporary and a new one will begin soon, where I am nothing but happy. Do I sound crazy yet?
I’ll give you a little insight into this. I view my school years, for example, as a completely separate life to the one I am experiencing now. Why? Because I was a different Nikita then, with different values and a completely different life. When I cast my memory back to this time, it is almost like looking on from a passer-by perspective, I can judge every action I made and talk about that time in my life as a different and completely separate life. As well, mu university years and my sixth form studies, every significant period of my life is separate – different person, different people in my life, different mindset and different memories.
Through passed lives and experiences I have went through hard times which have now passed, I’ve put up with sh*t and came out the other end with a lesson learned – and here I am still living. Some lives are longer than others and that’s okay because it will still pass by. One thing is always guaranteed: a new life will come along, your life will change and you can look back on past lives with a mind full of lessons and memories.
So, when life is getting me down and I feel like there is no way out, I remember that this life will pass too and within my next one I can look back as one of the harder lives but one with the most lessons. We underestimate how much we change throughout periods in our lives, we grow and become completely new people along the way. There is not just one of us, throughout our lives we develop new personas and leave bad traits behind.
It may sound like ramble to some and others may find meaning but this is simply how my mindset works and I find it has helped me a lot along the way. The truth is, we tend to be so focused on life as a direct process which when struggling can cause us to see no way out. There is, this life will pass when it needs to or when you change it and the new life will begin. It passes, I promise.